What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

Make Nazis afraid again!

Why do a lot of autistic people not know how to style their hair?

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

The Secret to Living Past 100? Scientists Say It Could Be Hidden in This Small Italian Village - SciTechDaily

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

For those who were actually old enough to have experienced the 1970s and not for those who were born in the 70s. What were the pros and cons of that era?

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Why do men cheat on their wives with someone extremely unattractive?

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

What would have happened if Shin was a good movie instead of a bad one?

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Are today’s baseball pitchers faster than a few years ago, or is it that radar guns have improved and get the pitch speed as it is released rather than as it reaches the plate?

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

TEXT:

Can a mother forget her child after she puts him or her up for adoption?

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Which current F1 drivers should switch teams based on historical patterns?

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Sorry, Trump supporters, but eventually it will have to be asked: Why didn't Trump do as well in his first term as he is doing NOW?

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Do guys prefer big boobs or small boobs? Why?

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.